I lost my best friend a couple days ago to suicide. I’ve been dealing with it ok so far, but today I visited his parents and they showed me the note he left, in which he instructed that I receive some possessions of his. Here is where I’m unsure of what to do or how to feel. I feel like it would be strange and painful to take and especially to use things that were his, like his computer. But should I take these things out of respect for his wishes? Should I hold on to them until I can better decide how I feel, or should I just get rid of them? Or let his parents keep them? If anyone has gone through this before, please share your thoughts and feelings. Maybe I will get some insight from your experiences.
Sorry for your loss Orpheon. 
I really don’t know what to say. As an outsider to this, I would say to accept the items in honor of his memory. I don’t think you would have to use them, but atleast accept them and hold on to them for a time.
Yeah, I’m so sorry too man. It’s one of the most difficult things to deal with - both for you and his parents. I’d suggest the same - ask the parents if they wanted to keep any of them and, if not, take them and keep them stowed away somewhere safe until you choose to start to move on.
So very sorry to hear of your loss.
I do agree with what Greg said. - Best to ask the parents if they had any intention on keeping the things he had said he left for you.
I can’t even imagine your pain right now, and to think that anyone needs to go through such a thing almost brings me to tears.
When my good friend was killed, I happened to have a hat that he gave me before he passed. And to be honest, it really helped me with my loss.
You may feel completely different, but I think that for him to of said that he wants you to have those certain things, Then that was his wishes… his gift to you… knowing that you would have been hurt just as much as anyone else… he wants to leave something for you to keep. To be honest, he is giving them to you as a gift - as his wishes to you.
Take care mate. And keep strong.
Thank you all for your kind words. I think I will take them and hold on to them then. Perhaps I may want them later on down the road.
damn that’s hard indeed! am so sorry for your friend, personally I think you should hold on to his items to honor him, and take good care of em, but if I may not be rude to ask, why did he commit suicide?
Take the stuff and cherish them because they were the things in life that made him happy. Whenever you’ll look at them you’ll remember the better days.
Sorry to hear that, mate. Hope you handle it well. As for your question: From my experience it can be quite confronting to have these items. My ex-gf once got a laptop from her aunt, who commited suicide. When she used it, she saw and history logs and favourites from websites about poison and other ways to end your life. You don’t want to see such things…
Personally, I would take some small item that reminds you of him. Something you can simply put in your house and look at. I would feel awkward using a dead friends stuff on a daily basis, like his computer or so. But it’s your call, ofcourse.
Sorry for your loss. Be strong and honor his memory bro. About his items, I’m on the same page as Hezus.
So very sorry for your loss.
Use the items and be ok with remembering him with a smile while you use the items. If ever you get to a point where you dont want them anymore, call the parents before getting rid of them. Let them know that you got some great use out of [items], but that you are going to be getting a new [item] and you want to find out if the parents would like [items] back.
A person lives internally through the impact of the actions they take. If you allow his action of stating he wants you to have and enjoy some things from him to go in vain then you are killing a part of his legacy.
man, suicide is usually the final solution for a temporary problem =\ so sad indeed
Perhaps cuz people keep hearing the VERY inaccurate saying “High school / College was the best years of my life”. It may be for some, but for a lot of people, schooling was the all time low in their life.
To someone that is experiencing the worst of it during school years, hearing and believing everything is going to go downhill from there would be crushing.
My condolences.
My advice to you is to accept those items (unless his parents wanted to keep some), and if you don’t wish to use them, sell them and use the money to commemorate him in some way. He would want you to use the items in the way that makes you the happiest, otherwise he would not have left them for you, and commemorating him in such a way will leave your conscience at peace.
Also, I hope this is of some consolation for you: Regardless of your belief in the afterlife, or whether or not suicide was the best option for him, it is a fact that his suffering is over. It might hurt to think about that now, but I hope that realization is eventually able to bring you peace.
Good luck.
He might have wanted you to take his computer for a reason.[/SIZE]
Sorry you had to go through that, I had a friend who was close to doing this once. Luckily he failed although he had to go to get corrections afterwards we both know he’s still glad to be alive. He’s still in school and he had to move, but once I get out of High School I’m gonna visit him and his bro to see if they’re ok. We may go to the same college so I’ll see if we can be roomies so he won’t have to be so stressed out.
If I were you I’d take his stuff to honor him, there may be some secret letter he left for you on the computer.
Again sorry.
Oh my god, I am so sorry for your loss, dude. My condolences. I can’t say I can sympathize, but I do empathize. Truly. If you ever need to talk, hit me up.
As for accepting the items he left to you, I would suggest that you follow his wishes as best you can. I understand that you may not want to use or even look at the items. Totally understandable. But it’s only honorable to follow the wishes he set out to make before he departed from this earth.
It’s tough, but it is what he wanted.
sorry for your loss
I really can’t say much about this, but I actually used to have certain suicidal tendencies
I don’t know if you should keep those items, it’s really all your choice
It took disney over 20 years to come up with Tron 2
Suicide blows. The one reason I couldn’t commit suicide (as tempted as I was in my younger more emo years) was because it would really fuck things up for people I knew.
But yeah, keep the items. It’s what he wanted.
If I left some of my shit to someone before I died and they refused them I would be really hurt (well…obviously I’d be dead, but you get the idea)