So... I pissed on my iPhone...

[BuzzKillington]

Yeah, probably not the best of forums to be posting this on, but I’m new - wanna buildup my post counts, and what better way then sharing with the world that I’m a fucking dumbass! Right?..

Anyways, I take a fuck ton of downers for sleep every night. Usually a mix of Xanax + Restoril (Temazepam), with a small dose of Benadryl. Well I took a bit too much last night and had a blackout. Somewhere during that blackout, I pissed all over myself and where did my phone happen to be? Well right against my dick of course. So I have a couple questions that other nerds could probably answer for me…

First off, my phone keeps trying to turn itself off. (I don’t blame it, if my owner pissed on me, I’d probably want to do the same). But seriously, every time I touch the screen, the ‘Drag to shutdown’ bar appears! It literally won’t let me access it. I’m assuming the good 'ol rice in a bag trick should draw out any moisture in the phone. But then I still have another problem…

My phone smells like piss. And I don’t mean that you can only smell it when you hold it up to your face. No, no no… I mean the smell of piss is just radiating off my phone. You stand within 5-feet of it, and it smells like someone who’s only eaten asparagus for the past year has pissed on it. So besides the moisture. How the fuck can I get rid of foul, piss-smelling, phone problems?

And before you ask - I’m fucking serious about this. Help is appreciated.

[Pyroclase]

@BuzzKillington

My phone smells like piss. And I don’t mean that you can only smell it when you hold it up to your face. No, no no… I mean the smell of piss is just radiating off my phone. You stand within 5-feet of it, and it smells like someone who’s only eaten asparagus for the past year has pissed on it. So besides the moisture. How the fuck can I get rid of foul, piss-smelling, phone problems?

In theory, you should be able to open it up and clean it out with something; damp paper towel, Q-tip, whatever the appropriate tool is. In theory.

In practice, you should just get a new phone.

Also, I’m pretty sure the rice-in-a-bag method is something you’re supposed to do ASAP.

[papernick]

Soak it in isopropyl alcohol (while it’s turned off, mind you).

[Orpheon]

@acade365

Soak it in isopropyl alcohol (while it’s turned off, mind you).

My first thought too. Also make sure to use a 99% type if you can. While isopropyl alcohol is non-conductive, common rubbing alcohol from most stores is around a 70% mixture, and while I think it might work, that other 30% might be conductive. If that’s the case, if your phone isn’t completely dry when you turn it back on, it could cause significant damage.

You might need to repeat a couple times with fresh alcohol to make sure the piss is all gone.

[sersoft]

take out the lcd, speaker and microphone before you do that, unless you want to buy a new LCD, speaker and microphone

[Surplus]

@BuzzKillington

Yeah, probably not the best of forums to be posting this on,

This is arguably the best forum to be posting this on because of sersoft. He knows more than entire forums depending on your luck of the draw.

[BuzzKillington]

@sersoft

take out the lcd, speaker and microphone before you do that, unless you want to buy a new LCD, speaker and microphone

Which I don’t… And having taken apart iPhone’s before - they’re nearly impossible to reassemble 100% correctly. So before I do that, I’m going to try rubbing the outside with a mix of baking soda and Hydrogen Peroxide. Since both of those are odor eliminators.

If that doesn’t work, I’ll try soaking it in isopropanol - but, like I said above I’d rather avoide taking the damn thing apart since I hate reassembling devices with microscopic screws.

Another good idea would also be… don’t piss on your phone

[GilCMassey]

I’m not so sure that method will work, but the aforementioned methods do work very well for eliminating odors from devices. Trust me on that, I won’t explain further than it was my brothers PSP when he was 8 x)

Also, you picked the perfect forum to post on actually.

You could try just opening and cleaning it, with something that smells good that won’t damage the phone (the alcohol and some lavender) and see if that helps it. Opening it is easy to put together again, so there wouldn’t be a problem. Just be careful not to soak it and ruin any of the important bits.

[BuzzKillington]

@0_22one

I’m not so sure that method will work, but the aforementioned methods do work very well for eliminating odors from devices. Trust me on that, I won’t explain further than it was my brothers PSP when he was 8 x)

Also, you picked the perfect forum to post on actually.

You could try just opening and cleaning it, with something that smells good that won’t damage the phone (the alcohol and some lavender) and see if that helps it. Opening it is easy to put together again, so there wouldn’t be a problem. Just be careful not to soak it and ruin any of the important bits.

Yeah - Isopropanol has a low boiling point so it evaporates quite quickly. Also, it doesn’t conduct electricity that well either due to it’s multiple methylated side-chains.

Hydrogen Peroxide would be a problem because it oxidizes fairly quickly when exposed to light. The decomposition formula of H2O2 is H202 + Light --> H2O + O2. So the peroxide would oxidize into water and oxide. Anyways, I’ll rub it with Hydrogen Peroxide + Sodium Bicarbonate. In theory that should neutralize the Uric acid and render the smell inert.

If that doesn’t work… Alcohol is it

@sersoft

take out the lcd, speaker and microphone before you do that, unless you want to buy a new LCD, speaker and microphone

I forgot to mention, what about the Li-ON battery? Should that be removed as well?

[JeffMOD]

I would expect so. Pack it in some rice for the time being.

[sersoft]

@BuzzKillington

Yeah - Isopropanol has a low boiling point so it evaporates quite quickly. Also, it doesn’t conduct electricity that well either due to it’s multiple methylated side-chains.

Hydrogen Peroxide would be a problem because it oxidizes fairly quickly when exposed to light. The decomposition formula of H2O2 is H202 + Light --> H2O + O2. So the peroxide would oxidize into water and oxide. Anyways, I’ll rub it with Hydrogen Peroxide + Sodium Bicarbonate. In theory that should neutralize the Uric acid and render the smell inert.

If that doesn’t work… Alcohol is it

I forgot to mention, what about the Li-ON battery? Should that be removed as well?

At the repair shop where I work, we only soak the motherboard, also we put it in a special micro-vibration box that looks like it was meant for sterilizing dentist’s medical equipment or something.