The WTF thread.

Diabolical · November 25, 2018, 4:53am

JeffMOD · November 25, 2018, 4:53am

So many people driving like they’re playing GTA.
Look, I’m not comfortable behind the wheel. I’ve had my G1 (learner’s permit) and no further for like 4 years.

At least I know how to signal and stay in my goddamn lane.

Tiki · November 25, 2018, 4:53am

Damn, Australia is full of bad drivers.

Why do they start cursing when they see someone drive on the right side of the road, though?

Diabolical · November 25, 2018, 4:55am

I hope you all have a strong stomach before you watch this.

NSFW
youtube.com/watch?v=xY7m4KzYR4Q

Chickenprotector · August 11, 2020, 11:35am

Uhm… I wonder if this is actually The Onion…

Italy’s highest court has ruled that masturbation in public is not a crime, as long as it is not conducted in the presence of minors. The decision came down from the Italian Supreme Court – La Corte di Cassazione – in the case of a 69-year-old man, identified only as “PL,” who was caught masturbating in Catania, a city on Sicily’s east coast.

The man was convicted in May 2015 after he performed the act in front of students on the University of Catania campus, according to documents filed with Supreme Court. The man was sentenced to three months in prison and ordered to pay a fine of €3,200 (around $3,600). However, the defendant’s lawyer appealed the case to the country’s highest court, which ruled on the side of the accused in June but only just made its decision public. Judges ruled that public masturbation out of the presence of minors is no longer deemed criminal conduct due to a change in the law last year, which decriminalized the act.

The new iteration of the criminal code does call for imprisonment – of up to four-and-a-half years – if the act is witnessed by a minor. In light of this ruling, the court overturned “PL’s” sentence. The case has been sent back to local courts in Catania to determine exactly what the administrative fine – between €5,000 ($5,651) and €30,000 ($33,912) – will be.

… Wat?

Diabolical · November 25, 2018, 4:55am

-snip-

Chickenprotector · November 25, 2018, 4:55am

I already posted that Freezing Moon. Take a look above your post.

LordDz · August 11, 2020, 11:35am

Sounds like Italy and Turkey are the places to go to!

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/turkey-child-sex-abuse-rape-erdogan-law-legalisation-a7193311.html

Seems like both countries are run by horny old men…

Chickenprotector · November 25, 2018, 4:55am

youtube.com/watch?v=5tqH-Un9SFU

Oh god… the stupid… it hurts…

Diabolical · November 25, 2018, 4:55am

I don’t know which thread to post this, but fucking hell this playthough it just painful to watch.
youtube.com/watch?v=xMCnlAQRtWc
Also, you might want to ignore some of the comments of the video.

edit: If you guys can’t tell the difference, you might want to watch this playthough. And then compare to the video above I posted

wayne_acoba · August 11, 2020, 11:39am

camel balls?!..liquid filled?11?! …why would anybody…ugh
(seen it in a kiosk in berlin the other day)

Chickenprotector · August 11, 2020, 11:40am

https://fox59.com/2017/07/24/wisconsin-company-to-become-first-us-company-to-microchip-employees/

TL;DR: Company is implanting RFID chips in their employees…

RIVER FALLS, Wis. — A Wisconsin company will become the first U.S. company to provide employees implantable microchips.

According to a press release, Three Square Market will offer the technology to all employees during a “chip party” on August 1. The program is optional.

“Employees will be implanted with a RFID chip allowing them to make purchases in their break room micro market, open doors, login to computers, use the copy machine, etc.,” the company said in the press release.

Over 50 staff members are expected to be voluntarily chipped between the thumb and forefinger underneath the skin. The chip uses the same NFC chip technology used in credit cards.

The company said there is no GPS tracking in the chips because the technology is similar to an office keycard.

Three Square Market builds and manages break room vending machine systems that utilize kiosks and software for purchases.

Uhm…

RedEye · August 11, 2020, 11:40am

But you get 3% savings with the chip, totally worth it.

Tiki · November 25, 2018, 5:06am

in b4 the company fires everybody who doesn’t get the upgrade
and then makes it mandatory for new employees

lambdaman · August 11, 2020, 11:40am

oh god
https://www.meetgraham.com.au/

LordDz · November 25, 2018, 5:06am

I sent my CV to a games company named “Zoink” here in Gothenburg, go out drinking…
Come back and turn my computer on only to find out a guy named “Zoinks” from the US has added me on steam.

Like… That has to be a sign, right?

Chickenprotector · August 11, 2020, 11:40am

Well after sitting here and laughing for a good 10 minutes:

Want to save planet Earth? You could apply for NASA’s Planetary Protection Officer role.

The National Aeronautics and Space Administration is currently looking for someone with a secret security clearance to ensure alien life, or “organic-constituent and biological contamination” doesn’t make it’s way back in a space ship.

More than that, this person is “responsible for the leadership of NASA’s planetary protection capability, maintenance of planetary protection policies, and oversight of their implementation by NASAs space flight missions,” according to the job listing.

Candidates must have “advanced knowledge of Planetary Protection,” experience overseeing nationally significant space programs and have demonstrated “skills in diplomacy that resulted in win-win solutions during extremely difficult and complex multilateral discussion.” After all, protecting the planet is sure to present challenges.

Requirements include frequent travel. Could business trips include intergalactic travel? Men in Black, is that you?

That’s a lot of responsibility for one person, which is why the job comes with a six-figure pay: $124,406 to $187,000 annually.

Thanks for keeping us safe, NASA.

TL;DR: NASA’s hiring someone to oversee planetary defense against various threats, including, but not limited to alien invasion.

No, it isn’t a joke. It actually exists.

Johnwalter · November 25, 2018, 5:06am

NASA is hinting us that they know something is out there, and they’re are starting to worry.

Flavrans · November 25, 2018, 5:06am

Well, what’s laughable is how totally off the mark that news article is.

This is to do with making sure that we don’t bring biological contaminants, intentionally or otherwise, along with human or robotic missions to other planets that could threaten or affect the natural evolution of potential existing life on those planets, and vice versa, making sure that potential biological contaminants or samples brought back from human or robotic missions to other planets don’t threaten life on earth.

It’s a serious issue that scientists need to consider and address when sending spacecraft or probes to other planets or bodies in our solar system, and maybe in the far future, other solar systems.

Chickenprotector · November 25, 2018, 5:06am

That is something I considered after I stopped laughing. Funny, yes, especially under the sense of pop-culture (hence why I posted it). In terms of a real-world problem, I can seriously see that, especially with NASA’s planned mission(s) to Mars and its budget being boosted significantly.