I tripped hurrying out the door to school once and shredded my arm with a pencil. A week or 2 later I pulled a chunk of graphite out of the wound and now have a scar.
I actually managed to stab myself in the finger with a pencil. I still have rests of graphite in my finger.
Yeah, you can still see a little bit of the color in my arm too.
Several years ago, I was boogieboarding at the beach. It was perfect, great weather, awesome waves… I had made several runs from about a hundred feet out back in the shore and caught the perfect wave for the next one.
And that’s about the time I ran directly into a Portuguese Man-o-War. :fffuuu:
I once got shit in face (just between my eyes, on top of my nose) by a 1.77 air rifle. The pointed lead pellet stuck in my bone. Point blank range. Not fun.
preserving this.
:fffuuu:
shit in face. Actually that reminds me of a horrid incident involving my cat and my mother. My mom was trying to read, and the cat jumped onto her lap, and started doing that cat thing of walking around in circles on her lap. At one point his butt was in her face and she tried to push him off. Then he launched a projectile shit directly into her eyeball. My mom screamed and it freaked all of us the hell out. By then the cat was well out of the vicinity. will NEVER forget that for my entre life…
That reminds me of this:
A few weeks ago I hacked into my left knee with the thing on the picture below while cutting down little trees in my internship. I limped to my car, tied the wound off with some bandages and drove to the hospital where it got sewn up.
Damn.
My dad sliced his elbow off (sounds strange) riding a minibike when he was a kid. Not me but still.
About 2 years ago, my best friend (who passed away a month ago 
) was handling my 30" full tang katana, and when he went to hand it back to me, handle up, he lost his grip and the blade headed towards my feet. Being a 30" blade, and considering he was holding the sword at waist-height when he dropped it, there were only about 3" between the blade and my foot, leaving very little reaction time.
So I simultaneously yanked my foot back while reaching for it with my right hand…and ended up catching the blade with my right hand as gravity did its work and drew the blade down the inside of my right index finger. Damn near took the finger off, the blade went down to the bone.
Mind you, my friend and I were at my house alone, were both 18 at the time so at least we had some (marginal) sense. Hydrogen peroxided the hell out of it, wrapped it in gauze and went about our day :-).
I fall off the bike all the time, I think I’ve totally ruined 4 bikes by crashing them into posts, trees, sidewalks and parked cars.
I’ve also broke my arm once while running after a bus on an icy road.
One time I was biking pretty fast at night and there’s a passage that blocks cars from going there (4 short concrete posts) well I thought I passed but I hit it pretty hard and felt pretty stupid, but I didn’t feel much pain. After I got home I realized that my ipod was what protected me. Obviously it got smashed to a million pieces though.
I was smashed by a car when I was J-walking a few months ago.
I once grabbed a glass doorknob and it popped in my hand.
During a football drill 2 years ago my right arm was shredded open right before the forearm by some kid’s broken helmet, the scar looks like a small candy.
Not much bad stuff happens to me, but that doesn’t apply to my friends:
One of my friends shot another in the back with a .22 on accident. It would only be serious if it was a real gun, but still . . .
Another, smaller stature friend was hit by a segway and broke his arm. Yeah, I know. A segway.
Two guys I know were making explosives (!), and one went off and blew off a lot of one guy’s hand.
One time I was golfing, and got hit by a 150 foot drive in the back. I rolled down a hill cussing, trying to smother the pain.
Most recently, I was lit on fire during a lab experiment, but it was only along half of my leg, and I smothered it by rolling.
Haha that segway accident rules
So I was camping and my friend tossed me one of those glass stink bombs that you throw on the ground, the fire we had last night was still smoldering so I tossed it in. About 2 minute later nothing had happened so I went to poke it with a stick… As I poked the glass it exploded sending shrapnel into both my eyebrows (pretty fucking close to losing my eyes) I had a 1 inch cut across my brow, it’s almost fully healed now. Not one of my smarter ideas, although my friend was laughing his ass off calling me a dumbass. (he’s probably right):3
And another day when I was surfing my board flipped and the fin almost went straight up my asshole. 
Once on a fishing trip my ADHD friend thought it’d be a good idea to stab at my face with a knife. Nearly fucking blinded me.
If I ever lose my sight I will go kill myself, my eyes are most prized organs.
my eyes, my genitals, and those other organs that you need… I like those ones too.
I cut my foot open on the propellor of a boat while failing at climbing onto it
I ran into a wire fence and gashed my arm
Both have massive scars